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The concept of a child-centered divorce is really quite simple. It is a divorce in which both parents put the needs of their children first and foremost. The execution of a child-centered divorce, however, can be challenging.

The Goal of a Child-Centered Divorce

The goal of a child-centered divorce is always to provide the best possible life for the children who affected by their parents’ separation. The concept recognizes that childhood is both limited and precious, and both parties involved in a child-centered divorce want to provide the best quality of life for their children, which includes both homes.  In this recognition, both parents make a commitment to ensure that their children will have an equally quality of life in either home. Often, this may require one parent making financial sacrifices that wouldn’t be necessary in another divorce arrangement.  

A child-centered divorce assumes that both parents are willing to ensure that their children continue to have the life that they deserve. In order to accomplish this lofty task, parents can use creative settlement to afford their children the extracurricular activities, travel opportunities, and lifestyle that enjoyed in a one-house intact family.  Transferring stock shares or funds from a retirement account are not as difficult as saying no to horseback riding lessons or private school.

The Emotional Challenge of Child-Centered Divorce

For many parents, the process of going through a child-centered divorce is emotionally challenging. It’s easy for anger or other strong feelings toward an ex-spouse to eclipse love for a child or children.

In these moments, however, it’s important to remember the initial impetus for a child-centered divorce. Childhood is precious, and even in the midst of a divorce, parents can seek to provide the best childhood possible for their children.

Sometimes in these moments, it can help to have a picture of one’s children during a happy moment to reference. A visual aid goes a long way toward reminding parents that no matter how strong anger toward an ex might be, love for a child can persevere.

The Benefits of a Child-Centered Divorce

The benefits of a child-centered divorce are a better life for the child. When this is the goal of two divorcing parents and it is executed well, the result is as seamless a transition as possible to a new life. And, that new life is one where life in each parent’s home is the same or similar quality.

Collaborative Divorce and a Child-Centered Divorce

One way to assure that the divorce process will keep the needs of the children at the forefront is through the Collaborative Divorce process.  The process begins by both sides stating their goals.  It is at this starting point that the needs children can be established as a primary goal for the divorcing couple.  The attorneys and the neutral professionals, a communications coach and a financial professional will help the couple to navigate the terms of the divorce while keeping the children in mind throughout.  The divorce is then finalized without going to court.

This article was originally featured on https://collaborativedivorce-collincounty.com/mean-have-child-centered-divorce/