Top 10 Parenting Tips and Quips from Family Court Judges and Attorneys

Mean JudgeOne of my favorite Collin County judges enjoys admonishing clients at most hearings involving children of the following: “The most important parenting decision that you make is the person you choose to have sex with.”  After that, the rest is history.

I have compiled a list of my top ten favorite phrases that family court judges and attorneys alike use in our daily life to explain the phenomenon of parenting:

  1. Shoes come in pairs.
  2. Takes two to tango.
  3. You choose her/him.
  4. Apples don’t fall far from the tree.
  5. Crazy is as crazy does.
  6. A one-night stand can last a lifetime.
  7. At some point, it was LOVE, or something close.
  8. Sex is a moment. Parenting is a lifetime.
  9. If he wasn’t that great after a few drinks, imagine parenthood.
  10. Don’t let your bad choice hurt your child’s future.

I challenge you to be prepared for this one-liners delivered in your direction from the witness box or being lectured to you by the judge post-hearing. That way, you won’t be as insulted/shocked when delivered in your general direction.  Advice for processing these comments?  Do not respond with argument or explanation as this may not end well.


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